In my previous post I have elucidate that parents should create a positive environment in home to keep their kids free from depression & insecurity. But many of us forget that to create such atmosphere, the parents itself should have a strong & healthy bonding .’Marriages don’t look after themselves. Just bcoz we have children doesn’t mean that our duty towards our spouse is over. So we should try to take out some time in our busy scheduled & spend together to enhance a healthy relationship with our partner.
Most of the couples thinks that after marriage there is no happiness,they have to take lots of responsibilities. It’s true that becoming parents changes the relationship between the spouses, at times not just for a month or a year but for a lifetime.Lovingly decorated houses become giant toy rooms. The packed calendar takes a toll… doctor visits, play dates, school admissions, PTMs-every little thing revolves around the child:add to this, sleepless nights. Priorities & roles change almost overnight.
But basically most of the womens goes through a difficult phase , they always tend to put themselves last. They are constantly made to feel that they are less, not good enough, they have to look a certain way, have to be a supermom, make enough money’, the list goes on & on. According to me, all these feelings are true in the form of ancient holistic practices.
If you can’t help yourself, how will you help others? So, try to expand this idea, & help yourself, make yourself feel good, the effects will be felt within the people you love, your family especially.
CARVING OUT SOMETIME FOR YOURSELF:
– If you’re a housewife, once the spouse & kids goes to work, find a way to get some alone time for yourself before plunging into household chores.
-Read a book,write a blog, chat with friends in social networking, pamper yourself or meet friends.
-Take a break from housework one day a week.
-If you’re a working woman, reserve a few hours on the weekend for yourself to do these things, without your spouse or children.
SMALL THINGS MATTERS A LOT:
Somehow I’m also a housewife & I too believe in all these things, mentioned above. My hubby has always been a workholic, he always remain busy in his officework. But still we both have a good communication .You all may be surprised by hearing this!!! But it’s true… Every morning before he goes to his offz he always give a hug & says bye…. He often says that ” I’m sorry I’m not able to give you a quality time….but I’ll always try my best keep you happy!!! Just a simple sentence but it touched my heart… 😊Sometimes gestures or words mean a lot., maybe more than the gifts.
As like other spouses we too often have arguments, but we both of us put equal efforts to tackle it out. Somehow all the credit goes to my hubby…. he however apologise first.Due to him only I learn that saying”sorry”doesn’t mean we accept or agree with the other persons opinion rather it is a genuine acceptance of putting our relationship with the person above the arguments & misunderstandings.
*Saying sorry at the right time diffuses the growing negativity. *
A good relationship is not where we don’t have arguments, it is about how we resolve disagreements.
Every now & then take time out…. This will also make the children understand that the parents are a unit.
To maintain healthy relationship it doesn’t mean that we always have to go for outing , spend money on buying valuable things for each other, check the phone caller id or keep on stalking on our partners social networking accounts/WhatsApp messages……so on.
MAKE IT SIMPLE:
– Go for a small walk.
-Spend some quality time chatting with our spouse every evening, once the kids go to sleep.
-Don’t treat parenting with gender assignex roles(father the breadwinner, mother the homemaker) as was ithe past. Work as a team, share responsibilities.
-Laugh together often.
-Eat together.
-Show affection the way you like.
-Go for a short vacation.
-Ban the mundane.
-Give some space to each other.
-And yes… give suprises be it small or big to make each other feel special.
#These things will not only bring us closer, but will also inculcate a sense of security in our kids of being brought up by parents who love each other.
Nothing is impossible if we once made up your mind. Initially it may be tough for us to follow but once we started, we will be automatically stick around to the idea.
My secrets for leading a healthy lifestyle!!!! 